Eavesdropping

Overheard at the grocery store:
Man on cell phone: I'll be so glad when the Olympics are over and I can go back to watching sports.

.....
Overheard at the gas station:
Woman talking to her husband who is putting gas in the car: Don't forget we need to stop at Walgreens before we go home. You're out of whopee pills.
(My first thought was Viagra. But I suppose it could be Vicodin.)

.....
Overheard at the shelter:
A woman to her friend: It was an OK first date but it would have been a lousy second date.

Eavesdropping
It's been far too long since I've shared any eavesdropping with you. It's amazing what you overhear people say...

Overheard at the grocery store
Woman to man, looking at the fish counter: Will you be home for dinner tomorrow night?
Man: Not if that's what you're cooking.

Overheard at the shelter
Woman 1: Are you a cat person or a dog person?
Woman 2: I'm a Brad Pitt person.

Overheard at the shelter
Man on cell phone: All their dogs look like lesbians.

Eavesdropping
Overheard at the shelter. For those of you not from around here there's a wildfire in a place called Bonny Doon, in the Santa Cruz mountains, not too far from here:
Guy 1: Have you heard about the fire in Bonny Doon?
Guy 2: No, what about it?
Guy 1: Um...well, that's it really. There's a fire in Bonny Doon.
Guy 2: (Obviously full of concern): Do you think I should grow a beard?

Eavesdropping

Overheard at the grocery store
Mother to child: Potato chips are not a vegetable.

.....
Overheard at the shelter 1
Man 1 (in a hideous blue and red Hawaiian shirt): That cat keeps staring at me.
Man 2: Maybe he's afraid of your shirt.

.....
Overheard at the shelter 2
Little girl to father: Why can't I touch the kitties?
Father: Because they might bite you.
Girl (pointing to me): They aren't biting her.
Father: She works here.
Girl: Doesn't she taste good?

Eavesdropping
Overheard at the shelter
Woman one (who was adopting two kittens): I'm going to name them Diego and Freda.
Woman two: You can't name them after lovers, they're brother and sister!

......
Not really eavesdropping as this woman at the shelter was talking to me
"I want to adopt a another cat because my kitty, Princess Maxine Pussyboots is lonely."

(Princess Maxine Pussyboots???!!!)

.....
Overheard at the grocery store
Man (on cell phone) in the wine aisle: I prefer red, she prefers white. So I think I'll get red. Besides, I think I'm going to break up with her anyway.

Eavesdropping
Overheard at the grocery store 1:
Man on cell phone: I was watching the Giants game, but I think she said he died.

(Wouldn't that be something you might want to be sure about?)
.....

Overheard at the grocery store 2:
Woman to man, in produce section: Get some carrots and some apples.
Man: Aren't we out of bread too?
Woman: Did I tell you to get bread?

(Well that's a happy marriage.
.....

Overheard at the shelter:
Little girl: Look mommy, kittens!
Mom: Don't touch the kittens, Imelda.
Little girl: If I don't touch them how will we know which one alive?

(Um, they're all alive, genius girl.)

Eavesdropping
Overheard at the grocery store:
Should we get soap or frozen waffles?

(I didn't know they were interchangeable.)
.....
Overheard at the gas station:
Man on cell phone: Yeah I know I said I was sick yesterday, but today I really am sick.

(He was wearing shorts and had the top down on his convertible.)

.....
Overheard at the shelter:
Woman 1: Did you know that Donna got engaged?
Woman 2: To Jack?
Woman 1: No, Tony.
Woman 2: Who's Tony?
Woman 1: Her fiance.

(Um...duh!)

Eavesdropping
Overheard at the shelter
Man to obviously dim woman: That black cat looks like a jaguar.
Obviously dim woman: Oh I think he's cute. You really think he looks like a car?

...
Overheard at the shelter 2
Woman on cell phone: He was just too Zen. And he likes Monopoly.

Not sure what those two things have in common. Can you be a capitalist Zen?